Sunday 7 June 2009

'WE'men or 'WOO'men

Why is it that men get the better of both worlds all the freaking time? They are put up on a pedestal and always given first priority in every relationship. In a marriage, the women always ends up giving more importance to what the husband wants, in a relationship the girlfriend always does things to please the other. Seldom does it happen vice versa. Take my case for example, I cook food Ro likes, I take part in social activities that Ro is interested in and does everything else in my life giving him the priority. My likes and dislikes take a back seat. I make an effort to like what he likes, but he relentlessly shows his disinterest in what i like, be it food, movies..name it and its true. I may get what i want at the end of it, but i have to throw a fit...which shouldn't be the best way. I'm sure there is a better way to do this. Sit him down and talk...nope not going to indulge in that lame activity again. It goes over his head.
I'm not sure about you but I know a whole lot of other women...moms, aunts, sisters, friends and a lot of others in blog world...who are exactly this way. A lot of the food blogs i follow mention why they make a particular dish because the better half likes it and not make something because he doesn't but craves for it so much, so waits till they are away to enhance their gastronomical pleasures. Why exactly are we doing this? I mean we are just like them and we deserve to get what we want right?????? Why are we trying so hard to please the men in our lives? Why cant they please us for a change...which I'm sure will never happen (at least in my case) so i am going to show my disinterest and cook food i like for a change (in fact i have already started:P) to start with.
Fridays are Pizza days and when we were in Nottingham, we used to buy the Tesco pizza's which were really good. Now that we are in London, we don't have a Tesco nearby and i absolutely dislike the Sainsbury and Asda pizza but love the Waitrose one, but the nearest is a tube stop away (these are the supermarkets here btw). So we tried out a few other Pizzeria's nearby, but they were either too expensive, bad service and wasn't all that great with regard to taste. I like Domino's and intend to stick to that. I tried all those other brands in the beginning because Ro liked it , but now i don't care..i want what i like! hmppppfffffff. If he wants let him get used to it.
WE should be men for a change and not try and WOO them all the time. Letting go in between is fine, but they should know we have likes and dislikes too and must respect that equally!

PS: I'm super pissed with a few things happening at my end and so the nasty post. I mean it though!

14 comments:

  1. ohh...dont even get me started...one and half year of marriage...till almost 3 months back i used to adjust and try everything possible to make my inlaws happy (I am forced to share my roof with them) and alas!!! MIL can never be happy with anything i do...so one day i decided to stop this and lead my life...I am a happy soul today..its surely tuf at times...but learning to ignore what ppl want and trying to concentrate on what i want....now even if i still share the roof with inlwas...i sometimes feel they are invisible to my eyes...hubby is understanding so i am still in the marriage...else it would be over long back...Its a man's world we must fight for our rights!!
    Enjoy life we get to live it only once...:)

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  2. Completely understand and it pisses me off whenever i hear mom or gramma or aunt or friend talk about how their other half likes it, so they do it...infact this is one of the qualities i dont like abt marriage...!!:D

    Hope the thing that is bugging u gets sorted out soon.. take care :)

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  3. @deeps: I don have a MIL to worry about but a husband is good enough. Yeah im gonna put my needs in front seat now onwards..let the man adjust henceforth:)
    Aarti: 'one of the qualities' you dont like about marriagr....yeah there are millions more. Glad you got that right:)

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  4. Why, why, why?????

    And if u ever decide to take out a morcha on this, count me in;-D

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  5. Ha ha ha.... that's encouragement :)

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  6. i'm so glad you were able to make all this sound so matter of fact! man... the blog i did on the topic n' hid after a while sounds like a cry of a loser! yours sounds positive and decisive! i have taken this resolution a million times (to put me myself n' i before robin) and have failed miserably every time...don't know if its love or restraint of self righteousness which makes me do this...i'm hoping it's undying love. i don't mean to say you actions don’t reflect love....you have succeeded in finding the balance that eludes me!

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  7. Miri...I have just started my journey and im getting my things done..how long thats gonna last, i dont know! but seriously im done with the martyr syndrome (ok im exaggerating a bit here..but still). I wouldnt ask anyone to over do it, cos then there will be conflicts but still i think we do deserve to be in the front seat once in a while.

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  8. Some men or rather all are lazy!:)

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  9. Rachelle....yeah the ones i know are all this way..crazy wud be an understatement:)

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  10. As I read your post, I could make out that there was more to it than meets the eye. U go, girl!!! I just loved the title of the post! :D

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  11. Butterfly...im telling u it feels so good to get things done ur way and what you want and how you want..im thoroughly enjoying it:)

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  12. Been dropping by here this past week but had too much on my mind to actually leave a comment. Nishi - men have always gotten what they wanted - from the beginning of time. I saw this with my Dad, Bro and now Husband. But one thing they truly appreciate and will never begrudge is YOU taking that step to make something out of your life. They will whine at first at the loss of attention but are remarkably flexible and will fit themselves into this new situation some how.

    If your greater fear is how the world will judge you as a wife just tell em to bugger off. Looking out for yourself doesn't mean you are selfish cos no one else is gonna do it for ya. How ever Nishi, I would suggest you cram as much of this happiness in as you can - cos once the kids come you cannot rationalize with them as to why "mummy needs a break so please sit with daddy for a while" - they will want only you. That will really drive you over the edge. We are what we are and have our social roles to play.

    Gosh I have gone all preachy again - this is your 43-year-old friend signing off!!! :P

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  13. AWWWW...yeah i know all that jane...but seriously it gets to me after a while and now im on this 'me first' deal and im loving it:)
    Though ro doesnt seem to have realized it and is going with the flow:)
    BTW i love the preachy u..wont be u if u don give all that gyan..love ya and welcome bak:)

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  14. cant agree more! every word is perfectly from my head :)

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